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Saturday, January 10, 2015

Change of plans

Some Christmas gifts are meant to last.  Others are only for  little while

On December 23, Christmas eve eve, we received a great gift.  Thursday night - just 16 days later, we lost half of it.

I won't say that the last 16 days were all rainbows and roses.  There were seven doctor appointments, forty poopy diapers, three time outs, and two days of pre k.  Since the kids came as a package, the younger would not let the older out of view.  There were tears at every potty trip (only one can fit at a time), and don't even try to put them to bed one at a time!  This little one held on to the older sibling like a security blanket.

I didn't expect the phone call, so I didn't have time to dread it.  Apparently the older child's father had a hearing at court on Thursday.  I was cleaning up and getting dinner finished so we could go to Awana, like we do every Thursday night.  Thursdays is for the big kids, and at a friends home.  So, I was wondering how I was going to corral a 7 month old, a toddler and a pre-k kid while the lessons were going on.  About 4:30 I get a hushed call, the cps worker was still in court but wanted me to have plenty of time to get my precious one packed and ready to go.  I guess this judge wanted to give the parent another chance.

There are parents who make poor choices, and then there are just bad parents.  I don't know enough about this parent to know the difference, yet.  I hope I never do.  I just pray that this judge really did what was in the best interest of the child - not the parent.  Fortunately I had my two big girls to help me quickly pack.  The cps worker was supposed to be there within the hour.  I not only had to separate the kids toys and clothes, I needed to separate out what was already ours.

It took longer than expected, but at 7:30, the worker and her supervisor showed up.  This was tough.  I didn't want to let this child go, but what choice do I have?  The foster parent doesn't get a say.  We are just here to love the children and give them a safe place to live.  Our job is to love, protect, and allow the child to be a child without worrying.  They should worry about food, safety, or punishment.   Foster parents should praise the child - a lot!  Rules (to an extent) go out the window.  Who cares if a plate is left at the dinner table or a two-year-old took his sippy cup to his room?  If toys were left out, pick them up.  We all forget to pick up after ourselves.  If a five-year old digresses and needs pull ups, buy pull ups.  Praise the trips to the potty, but don't scold for using the diaper.

These are things we should remember for our own children.  Although our child are our, we could loose them at any time (death, illness).  We never know how long we will have our foster children.  That's what makes it so challenging, and heart breaking.   We want every moment to be glorious, and for that child to always remember how LOVED they felt while in our presence.

That's how to show the love of Christ





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